top of page
Search
  • projectpositivity2

Guilty! Guilty! Guilty!

Often enough, young teens such as ourselves are plagued with the mindset of self doubt and insecurity. Personally, these thoughts often come from those who I consider close friends and family. Although I’m treated well and I enjoy my time with them, there are certain moments in which I feel guilty for something I shouldn’t even feel any remorse for. 

I often think about how my choices may influence my peers, but what I forget to worry about the most is myself. Should I be apologising for something I didn’t do? Is it my fault? Did I cause this to happen? Am I the problem?

The technical term for this is called guilt tripping and can be defined as a feeling of unjustified guilt and responsibility. Even within my own close group of friends I find myself afflicted with these emotions and the thing I find most difficult to overcome in these situations is how I should react. 

I’m recalled back to the moment where I decided to meet up with a few friends. We were enjoying the day together when we saw that we had upsetted another friend by not including them. This is where my dilemma begins. I tried not to let it ruin my day because I understand that I shouldn’t feel any remorse for having fun and meeting up but that small voice in the back of my head kept repeating those words. “You should’ve included them.”, “You’re a bad friend.”. Now, I can understand why they felt this way because I’ve been in the same shoes before but I never purposely intended to ruin anyone’s fun because of my own feelings. It still troubles me to this day on how I should’ve reacted. I could emphasise with them and how they felt left out but was it right for them to place a sense of responsibility and guilt on us?

I believe these feelings on both parties often come from the roots of self doubt, insecurity and abandonment. It’s important to look at things from a broader perspective. Will I let this small incident ruin my perception of them? Is this worth the precious time I have with my friends? And although it still troubles me, I’ve tried to improve myself and include them in more of my life. I hope that eventually, our road to a more secure friendship will be more than just guilt trips and unjustified feelings. There is no such thing as a perfect friendship or relationship. What matters most is how you feel and how you can improve. 


JoYii Wong

14 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Change is hard; whether it be the shift from high school to college, home to a dorm room, or the current, albeit slow, shift out of a pandemic-ridden world, transitions can be a massive source of stre

We may not see it ourselves but social media can be extremely tiring. In this day and age, we are more connected than ever, especially during the pandemic where we turn to social platforms to fill in

bottom of page