Facing Our Problems

I want to be honest. I want to be emotionally strong. I want to be happy. However, the thought of achieving that feels difficult—especially when the emptiness inside me continues to grow. And with the emptiness comes anxiety, and with the anxiety comes insecurity, and with the insecurity comes confusion, and so on. But I have to ask myself, why do I let it get to this point? Why do I let these feelings build up? Well, the simple answer is this: it’s easier than handling the problems and difficulties that create those feelings.

Why is it so difficult to face problems?

1. Feeling like it will cause more problems.

Sometimes it feels like it might just be better to not face the issue at hand because doing so could spark disagreement or arguments. Sitting in silence rather than speaking up feels like the safe option

2. The way your parents raised you.

Parents play a large role in shaping the way we respond to things. Growing up in an environment where problems were ignored or improperly handled sometimes causes us to be the same way.

3. We minimize our issues.

We dismiss the severity of our problems because we feel like they aren’t “valid” enough or that “it’s not that big of an issue” in comparison to others. This just makes it more difficult to address our problems because we don’t view them as actual ones.

These are just a couple of reasons why it’s difficult to face our problems; however, it is important to understand that ignoring them isn’t healthy. I’ve learned that doing so impacts my relationships and my mental health negatively, which ironically creates more problems. While ignoring them may be the easier thing to do, it certainly isn’t the best idea. It’s difficult to train ourselves into facing them since it’s something we’ve been used to our whole lives—I even struggle with it now—but there are ways. Trust me.

1. Stay in touch with your emotions.

When doing so, we can understand ourselves better and understand how we make others feel. This is such a significant part of facing your problems as it tends to more clearly define our perceptions/opinions.

2. Form a support group.

If you have difficulty with communicating your problems, finding a group of people or just friends you can talk to is so important. Now you may not have those kinds of people in your life, but if you do then definitely use that to your advantage. Talking with my friends about my problems has allowed me to understand myself better and it provides a different perspective on an issue that I never considered. Their encouragement overall is motivating in facing my problems.

3. Write, write, and write!

Using a diary or notebook to write about your issues is amazing. I do it often, and it forces me to take on the problem like an essay. I provide evidence, I analyze my feelings, and so forth. It’s like my therapy: it allows me to delve deeper into my thoughts, which often inspires me to take on the issue.

I promise you, it will get better. Those solutions may seem ineffective right now, but your growth as a person will allow them to be effective! As someone who still struggles with taking on my problems, these solutions have inspired change in how I take them on. And I hope one day they’ll inspire you.

Ava Polk